more of you, less of me

i am sitting here staring a blank screen, wondering where i should begin. what words should i share? are they words that would even matter? i am so overwhelmed by emotions and consumed by thoughts. rather than put those on here, let me explain who i am and what gypsy tree is.

firstly, i am a Christian. i adore being a daughter of a King who isn’t moved by the world. He is with me, goes before me and has written my name on His hand. He constantly pursues a love relationship with us. Jesus is there and has always been. He is sheer bliss and a fulfillment that is beyond any wonderful you have felt before.

i am a people pleaser by nature. it's the way God designed me. i just want everyone to be happy with me and like me. but, as i've learned, that is not possible. you simply can't please everyone all of the time. as a photographer i naturally want to please all of my clients. i want them to walk away from our session not only blown away by their pictures but i also want to gain them as a friend. sadly, i've had to realize not everyone will absolutely love their pictures. regardless of the reason, the rejection is ouchie

i have always had a camera in my hand from the time i was just a wee one. when there was a sleepover or class trip, everyone could always count on me to drag my camera along (good thing there wasn't facebook back then). like many photographers, my love of photography amplified by photographing my own children to share with friends and family. after one traumatic visit to a "famous" portrait studio, i made up my mind to never put my littles through that again. a few days later, I bought my first not-so-cheap camera. that was the moment gypsy tree was born.

when i began this adventure, i knew a few things.  i knew i absolutely wanted God to be a huge part of my business.  and with lots of prayer, i established the three rules i've always ran my business by.  i treat my clients as i would want to be treated.  i'm respectful and just chat and laugh like we're old pals.  mostly because this is my personality.  secondly, i never charge more than i would be willing to pay.  i found out firsthand the astronomical amount some photographers charge.  i never wanted to do that, ever.  i feel everyone has a right to family memories being cherished, regardless of their occupation and pay range.  and lastly, i want you to come as a client but leave as a friend.  i truly mean that.  i cherish all my clients.

there are a few things that really make my heart truly sad. finding out other photographers, ones that i've never even met or spoken to, run me down every chance they get. that other photographers that i don't know have me blocked on facebook. this one i truly don't understand. as an artist, i love looking at others work. i appreciate their work. i can look at a photograph that someone else took and appreciate it's beauty. while these things might break my heart, i won't allow it to crush my spirit. actions, and photographs, speak louder than words. i know in my heart i'm the same person now as i was when i began this business. and i will be the same person years from now.

i really feel God has called me to be a photographer and blessed me with this gift. i can honestly say though, the rejection crushes a part of my spirit. and in my weaker moments, i find myself giving in to satan's lies about my work and about me as a person. satan takes every opportunity he can to swoop in, knock me down and leave me feeling vulnerable.

 

the Bible never tells us to please other people. you can search through the Bible verse by verse, front to back, and you'll never find those words in it. but what you will find is instruction to please God. He IS the most important element in our lives. and when we live to please God, when we run a business to please Him, we may not be pleasing everyone around us. God is reminding me that He didn't call me to live a happy life, but a life that honors Him. and while I’m going to fail over and over again, my desire is to live the life He has called me to live.

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Galatians 1:10

xoxo

amy